Men’s Issues in Therapy

As suicide rates rise among middle-aged white men, there is a growing effort to break down the stigma around seeking help from mental health professionals. Many men find it difficult to ask for assistance—even something as simple as directions—let alone reach out to a counselor. This reluctance can have lasting effects on their well-being.

Research increasingly shows that men who view therapy as a sign of weakness or as an inability to handle their issues independently face greater challenges over time. This mindset can lead to difficulties in relationships, a higher risk of substance abuse or “numbing” behaviors, and even shortened lifespans.

“This inability, reluctance, or straight-up unwillingness to get help can harm men’s own mental and physical health and can make life more difficult for their friends and families,” says Jill Berger, PhD, an expert in the psychology of masculinity. Studies show that, across age groups and ethnicities, men are much less likely than women to seek support. In fact, among those seeking counseling for similar issues like substance abuse, depression, or stress, less than a third are men.

The issue goes beyond stigma; traditional therapy models can also feel inaccessible. Many therapeutic approaches rely heavily on emotional exploration and introspection, which may not always resonate with male clients. Savvy counselors adapt by incorporating techniques that align better with men’s perspectives, still leading to essential outcomes like emotional awareness. This, in turn, supports better communication with partners and strengthens support networks.

How can we help shift these attitudes?

First, it’s essential for men to recognize they’re not alone in facing depression, grief, trauma, anxiety, or other challenges. These struggles are common, and seeking help is normal.

Second, confidentiality is guaranteed. This assurance is particularly important for men in cultures where admitting mental health concerns might affect their social standing.

Third, positive encouragement is key. Many men initially come to therapy at the urging of a partner, often as a last effort to mend a relationship. But genuine engagement can’t be forced; it’s about helping them see the value of seeking support for themselves.

Finally, it’s time to reframe asking for help as empowering. Taking control of one’s mental health is a powerful step toward strength, resilience, and self-awareness. Just as with a personal trainer for physical fitness, therapy can symbolize strength and success. There’s no shame in wanting to be your best self—right?