Counsellor New Westminster

Loving Someone with Narcissistic Traits: Understanding the Patterns and Supporting Your Emotional Stability

By Keith Norris, RTC, MTC Intimate relationships involving narcissistic traits are often marked by early intensity, idealization, and a strong sense of being uniquely chosen. This early phase creates the impression of depth and emotional investment. As the relationship evolves, however, many partners encounter patterns that are difficult to understand and even harder to predict. These patterns include sudden withdrawal, shifts in warmth,…

Continue ReadingLoving Someone with Narcissistic Traits: Understanding the Patterns and Supporting Your Emotional Stability

How Social Media Disrupts Adolescent Identity: Narrative Development, Echo Chambers, and Emotional Radicalization

Developing a coherent and stable identity is a central task during adolescence. According to Erikson (1968), this period is characterized by a conflict between identity versus role confusion, in which young people begin to consolidate a sense of self by integrating personal values with those modeled by peers and society. However, this period is also a time when adolescents are particularly vulnerable to…

Continue ReadingHow Social Media Disrupts Adolescent Identity: Narrative Development, Echo Chambers, and Emotional Radicalization

Uberized Therapy: How “Convenience” Undermines Confidentiality and Care

“Uberized” online therapy platforms—like BetterHelp, or subscription based ones like Talkspace—have surged in popularity over the past decade, partly due to their promise of affordable, on-demand mental health care. But these services often trade away client confidentiality, compromise clinical quality, and treat therapy as a commodity rather than a relational process. Below, I explore how Uber-style mental health platforms betray core ethical principles…

Continue ReadingUberized Therapy: How “Convenience” Undermines Confidentiality and Care

Discipline, Dopamine, and the Decline of Sustained Effort: The Lost Skill of Doing Things You Don’t Want to Do.

The ability to do things we don’t want to do often attributed to a construct called “discipline.” However, this framing obscures a more complex interplay of neurocognitive conditioning, environmental influence, and shifting cultural values. Increasingly, what is perceived as a lack of discipline may in fact reflect a neurological adaptation to novelty-saturated digital environments—particularly those designed to exploit dopaminergic reward pathways. The erosion…

Continue ReadingDiscipline, Dopamine, and the Decline of Sustained Effort: The Lost Skill of Doing Things You Don’t Want to Do.

Why You Still Feel Like a Fraud (Even After You’ve Earned It)

Understanding Imposter Syndrome and How to Break the Loop You’d think that getting the job, landing the client, or being handed the mic would settle things. That at some point, confidence would catch up to competence. But for many people—especially those in high-performance fields or creative industries—that feeling never really arrives. Instead, success brings something else: doubt. Sometimes louder than ever. What Is…

Continue ReadingWhy You Still Feel Like a Fraud (Even After You’ve Earned It)

The Role of Personality in Aviation Performance

Aviation professionals, particularly pilots, are often thought to embody a unique blend of skills and personality traits—the so-called "right stuff." While cognitive and technical abilities are well-established as essential for pilots, air traffic controllers, and aviation maintenance technicians, the influence of personality traits on aviation performance is more complex and nuanced. The "Honeymoon Effect": Personality’s Delayed Impact The role of personality in aviation…

Continue ReadingThe Role of Personality in Aviation Performance

The Polarization of Society: Holding Fast to Your Values in a Fear-Based Compliance World

The polarization gripping society today is undeniable. It feels like a relentless tug-of-war, with mounting pressure to choose a side—failure to do so risks marking you as an outcast. For many, conformity seems like the only path to safety. With ideological enforcers seemingly everywhere and the demand to align intensifying, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed, as if you’re sinking under a flood of…

Continue ReadingThe Polarization of Society: Holding Fast to Your Values in a Fear-Based Compliance World

Overcoming Emotional Conditioning

Occasionally, we encounter rare moments of clarity and happiness, where the weight of sadness and anxiety seems to disappear even for a minute. These moments - a quiet summer evening at the beach, recovering from illness, or being moved by art or music makes us wonder whether life could feel less like a burden. What if we could let go of fear and…

Continue ReadingOvercoming Emotional Conditioning

Navigating Value Conflicts at Work: Strategies for Depersonalization and Professional Resilience

By Keith Norris, Counsellor in New Westminster BC For many individuals, work provides a sense of purpose and a platform to live out their values. However, situations often arise where job responsibilities or workplace cultures clash with personal principles. This misalignment can lead to stress, disillusionment, and burnout. While not every role or organization will align perfectly with an individual’s values, it is…

Continue ReadingNavigating Value Conflicts at Work: Strategies for Depersonalization and Professional Resilience

Counselling for Anxiety and Depression

Understanding the Link Between Anxiety and Depression: Two Sides of the Same Coin I often hear clients say, “I can’t tell if I’m anxious or depressed.” This confusion is common because anxiety and depression frequently go hand-in-hand, creating a cycle of overwhelming thoughts and emotions. While they are distinct conditions, their close relationship means that they often occur together, blurring the lines between…

Continue ReadingCounselling for Anxiety and Depression

Dispelling the Stigma: Men Seeking Counselling

Men's Issues in Therapy As suicide rates rise among middle-aged white men, there is a growing effort to break down the stigma around seeking help from mental health professionals. Many men find it difficult to ask for assistance—even something as simple as directions—let alone reach out to a counselor. This reluctance can have lasting effects on their well-being. Research increasingly shows that men…

Continue ReadingDispelling the Stigma: Men Seeking Counselling

Mandatory vs Aspirational Ethics in a Professional Counselling Framework

In the field of counseling, understanding the distinction between Aspirational and Mandatory Ethics is crucial for navigating the ethical landscape of the therapeutic relationship. Aspirational Ethics represent a counselor's endeavor to exceed basic ethical standards, focusing on the spirit rather than the letter of ethical guidelines. This approach encourages personal growth, moral responsibility, and a client-centered decision-making process. Conversely, Mandatory Ethics outline the…

Continue ReadingMandatory vs Aspirational Ethics in a Professional Counselling Framework

Your Privacy and Preserving The Personal Touch in Mental Health Care

The expanding role of online mental health support offered by firms like BetterHelp, merits some critical inquiry. These companies took advantage of the relaxed regulations around mental health care during the COVID pandemic resulting in some serious ethical breaches. Your public health data is strictly confidential and protected under privacy laws like the Canada’s Personal Health Information Protection Act (PHIPA). Under very few…

Continue ReadingYour Privacy and Preserving The Personal Touch in Mental Health Care

Navigating the Psychedelic Journey: The Imperative of Qualified Integration Therapy

The field of mental health treatment is evolving, and recent research highlights the significant benefits of psychedelic-assisted therapies. These therapies, which utilize psychedelic compounds, have shown promising results beyond their recreational use. As more individuals seek these benefits, there's a growing demand for professional psychedelic support. However, alongside these advancements, there's a rise in negative experiences. By Keith Norris  Many individuals feel confused,…

Continue ReadingNavigating the Psychedelic Journey: The Imperative of Qualified Integration Therapy

How Do I know if Counselling is Working?

Determining whether counselling or therapy is effective for improving your mental health can be a subjective process, influenced by various factors unique to you. I want to provide you with some indicators that can suggest positive outcomes and help you assess if counselling or therapy is working for you. Improved symptom management: If you've noticed a decrease in the intensity, frequency, or duration…

Continue ReadingHow Do I know if Counselling is Working?

Are You Burned Out?

There are misconceptions surrounding burnout, and it is not merely feeling slightly overworked, stressed, or tired. Burnout manifests as a distinct clinical syndrome characterized by several key symptoms. There are misconceptions surrounding burnout, and it is not merely feeling slightly overworked, stressed, or tired. Burnout manifests as a distinct clinical syndrome characterized by several key symptoms. One significant symptom is emotional exhaustion, which…

Continue ReadingAre You Burned Out?

What Happens in Couples’ Therapy

Couples therapy often conjures an unromantic image, associated with patience, arduous work, and uncomfortably intimate discussions about matters we would rather avoid contemplating, let alone discuss with both our partner and a trained stranger.  Our culture places great emphasis on trusting and following our feelings. However, couples therapy understands that relying solely on our feelings can lead to disaster, as our emotions are…

Continue ReadingWhat Happens in Couples’ Therapy

Exploring the Hidden Benefits of Mental Illness

When considering our psychological well-being, it may seem peculiar to consider the positive aspects of being unwell. One might argue that there are only downsides to such a condition. However, instead of assuming, as we often do, that our mental illnesses are solely problematic, we can embark on a journey of open-minded exploration. We can dare to ask ourselves: What purpose do my…

Continue ReadingExploring the Hidden Benefits of Mental Illness